Homicidal Queen

“Excuse me can you tell me the worst thing you’ve heard about me
Maybe that I’m a little harlot homicidal queen
You know I heard that I don’t belong in this scene
Sex, metal, barbie, whore, attention fiend”
~ In This Moment – Sex Metal Barbie

Homicidal Queen

wearing:
hair:  Lamb. Babydoll – Fatpack (*new* @ FaMESHed)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: –Belleza– Freya
skin: [theSkinnery] Paola

The Horror!~Queen of Ice – Metal (*new* @ Tannenbaum)
BONDI . The Artist Sunglasses
VINYL – SuperChic Crop (*new* @ FaMESHed)
.miss chelsea. Holi Shorts  (*new* @ Tannenbaum)
***comes with fishnets & fantastic hud that allows you to cut them to fit
[Gos] Frenchie Ankle Boots (*new* @ FaMESHed)

GingerFish Poses – Sadystika
Mesh India Shade Backdrop Natural

 

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Find the light

This entire song has been one of those songs that I’ve related closely to from the very first time I heard it. There’s a weird sense of comfort in surrendering myself to the pain accompanied by lyrics. I didn’t list all of the lyrics, just the first punch. This is one of those songs that just…well…give it a listen sometime and if you really hate the melody, maybe just google the lyrics and read them over. *shrugs* Do what you want, I know I do. *forces a smile*
“Yesterday was the tornado warning, today is like the morning after
Your world is torn in half, you wake and let’s wait to start the morning process
Rebuilding and you’re still a work in progress
Today is a whole new chapter, it’s like an enormous ass
The thunderstorm has passed ya
Your weather didn’t poke his eyes out with the thorn bush that you
Used to smell the roses, stopped to inhale can’t even tell your nose is stuffed
So focused on the brightside, then you floor the gas pedal
And hit the corner fast, the more asserted
Never looking back, may hit the curb
But everyday is a new learning curve, as you, steer through life
Sometimes you might not wanna swerve
But you have to to avert a disaster, lucky, no permanent damage
Cause they hurt you so bad, it’s like they murdered your ass
And threw dirt on your casket, but you returned from the ashes
And that hurt that you have, you just converted to gasoline
And while you’re burning the past, standing at inferno and chant
I’m standing in the flames
It’s a beautiful kind of pain
Setting fire to yesterday
Find the light, find the light, find the light”

another day

wearing:
hair:  Lamb. Bliss (*new* @ C88)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara
skin: [theSkinnery] Paola

(Yummy) Auspicious Necklace (*new* @ Uber)
^^Swallow^^ Princess Bento Rings

Blueberry Aria – Button Up Top
Blueberry – Tinker Set – Long Legwarmers

crate Porch Rocker ~ Yellow (*new* @ The Liaison Collaborative)
crate Porch Rocker ~ Decor (*new* @ The Liaison Collaborative)
***pose used is in the chair***

Your strength is in your weakness

Every so often I fall back on the lyrics of a song, because so often they reflect what I’m feeling. Also, because sometimes what I’m feeling is just too painful and deeply personal to write about or I’m simply not ready.

“It finds you in a cold room
A silhouette against the wall
Lit up by the white moon
We’ll outrun the awaking dawn

You can see the faces
But you don’t know their thoughts
You can feel the traces
From the chalk lines on my heart

There’s something in the shadows
Cuts you like an arrow
Shifting through the dark
Your strength is in your weakness
There’s fire in your blood
Hanging from that hope
But everybody knows
There’s something in the shadows”
Amy Stroup -In The Shadows

Your strength is in your weakness

wearing:
hair:  Lamb. Stellar  (*new* @ FaMESHed)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara
skin: [theSkinnery] Paola

.miss chelsea. Niki Headphones Silver
-:zk:- Joy (*new* @ Kinky)

pose: FOXCITY. Soulfood Bento Pose Set

***If you are reading this on any site that suggests this post was originally published anywhere but SadyStyle by anyone other than Sadystika Sabretooth, you are reading a stolen post.

Skyscraper

“You can take everything I have
You can break everything I am
Like I’m made of glass
Like I’m made of paper
Go on and try to tear me down
I will be rising from the ground
Like a skyscraper, like a skyscraper”
~Kerli – Skyscraper

As humans, we take a lot of punches throughout our lives. Yet, with each passing day, we either grow stronger or weaker. Ultimately, the choice is ours. Mentally and emotionally, I’ve definitely grown stronger. My body? Eh, not so much. I should have taken better care of it when I was younger, but I was invincible and never imagined I’d live past 30. Here I am dealing with level 8 pain daily as the weather changes. Yet, the emotional and mental tolls have been far more difficult to face.
There have been times that I’ve felt as fragile as glass, as delicate as tissue paper, and I’ve been beaten down both literally and figuratively. But each and every time, so far, I’ve gotten up. I’ve gained strength from the pain. In fact, there are times that by keeping my pain to myself and not complaining about it, by not showing it to the world, that I can borrow from it….channel it into strength. I’ve siphoned power from the pain to keep going. Perhaps I’m a bit stubborn, too. I feel like if anyone is going to genuinely take credit for me falling apart, its going to be me. So, until I’m ready to curl up with the worms for eternity, I will continue to rise like a skyscraper.

***If you are reading this on any site that suggests this post was originally published anywhere but SadyStyle by anyone other than Sadystika Sabretooth, you are reading a stolen post.

Skyscraper

wearing:
hair:  Lamb. Dove (*new* @ Uber)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara
skin: [theSkinnery] Amber (*new* @ C88)

EF: Acanthus Headpiece (*new* @ X by FaMESHed)
EF: Acanthus Mask (*new* @ X by FaMESHed)
[The Forge] Xane Collar, Black (*new* @ X by FaMESHed)
Legal Insanity – Mistress dress (*new* @ X by FaMESHed)
_CandyDoll_ Claudia Boots (*new* @ C88)

pose: FOXCITY. Sass Bento Pose Set

Paparazzi – BACKDROP – Grime Block Balcony
BUENO-NightSpot Loft Building-Regular

Bloggies!

So, this is just super exciting news that I’m dying to share. I really try not to boast or brag ever, because I just think its tacky. However, I just won an award for Best Narrative Blogger by BVN!! This was such a huge deal to me, especially considering who the runners up were. I mean, Strawberry Singh and Skippy Beresford? Seriously? I don’t know how I won over either of them, because they are two of the most talented photographers and bloggers I’ve ever seen. All I can say is that I have some seriously good friends and readers. Upon receiving my award, I knew that I owe it to my readers to be better than song lyrics and quick quotes. So, I’m going to do my absolute best to actually write more. I’m not saying I won’t still use song lyrics here and there, but I’m going to try not to rely so heavily on them going forward. You are the ones that voted for me and I appreciate it soooooo much. The best way I can show you how grateful I am

Bloggies 2018

wearing:
hair:  Lamb. Garden (*new* @ FaMESHed)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara
skin: [theSkinnery] Amber (*new* @ C88)

: CULT : Dark Side Rings
[ kunst ] – Lucy choker
(Yummy) Cleopatra Nose Ring – Silver
Schadenfreude Tear Dermal Piercing
-SU!- Medusa Piercing Silver

*T.Whore* – Sexy Fur Stole White MESH
Kaithleen’s Kala Set

pose: FOXCITY. Rain Bento Pose Set (*new* @ C88)
location: BVN Bloggie Awards

Your Nightmares are my Lullabies

I go to sleep to crime shows…let me explain why. Well, I’m not completely sure why, but I do know some of the reasons. Ok, so part of it is that I’m a city girl and I’m used to hearing noises while I sleep. I cannot sleep to complete peace and quiet. Once I’m asleep, then quiet is good. Thank goodness for sleep timers. Whoever made that a feature on TVs sure deserves more recognition. Alright, so why crime shows vs music or something “happier?” Well, I like shows that I can imagine…that I can picture without looking at the screen. The crime shows on DiscoveryID (wicked channel in the U.S.) are perfect, because the ones I watch always catch the killer and they’re on Hulu or AmazonPrime without any loud, obnoxious commercials. Forensic Files is my absolute favorite, because the narrator has the greatest voice! It’s soothing and calm, yet crystal clear. I do sometimes go to sleep to sitcoms, but only those that don’t change the scenery a lot. So, now you know why your nightmares are my lullabies. Plus I’m twisted. *grins*

your nightmares are my lullabies

wearing:
hair:   Lamb. Boyish (*new* @ C88)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara
skin: [theSkinnery] Amber (*new* @ C88)

Kibitz – Cash out rings – onyx (*new* @ Kinky)
:::ChicChica::: Holy blood cocktail (*new* @ Salem)
Blueberry – Maria – Bomber Jacket
Blueberry – Maria – Skirt
Blueberry – Maria – Boots – Flat Heels (comes w/high heel version, too!)

pose: .::Attitude::. Machete_Pose_Pack (*new* @ PoseFair)

Baked

“Its been a while since I started my day with a wake-n-bake, but after last six very hectic days…I can now say it. It feels goooood,” she whispered into thin air as she stared at it lying there. It had stopped her in her tracks and she was suddenly frozen in the spot. She couldn’t move an inch…she tried to look away, but her eyes returned as witness over and over again.
“Why does it look like that? How did it get here? Is that what I think it is? OMG, what the hell is wrong with me for even thinking that?”

xtc sassy pose fair_004
“WHAT IS IT!?!?!?!” screams Tracy from the other end of the call.

wearing:
hair:  Lamb. Garden (*new* @ FaMESHed)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara
skin: [Glam Affair] Dee

KITJA – Karina Sweatshirt WHITE
UC_Morgan (*new* @ Kinky)
Eudora3D Riding Boots (*new* @ Salem)

pose: ~X.T.C PoSes~ Miss Sassy [Static Pack] (*new* @ Pose Fair)
location: Bardeco

Is This What I’ve Become?

“All the voices in my head are coming to life
They’re getting louder and I’m terrified
How do you run from your own mind?
Is this what I’ve become?
Take it back what have I done”
~Faith Marie – Antidote

I'm Fine

wearing:
hair:  Lamb. Fox – Fatpack (*new* @ Uber)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara
skin: [Glam Affair] Dee

^^Swallow^^ Princess Bento Rings
Scandalize.Elva.TOP. (*new* @ Uber)
Scandalize.Elva.LEGGINGS (*new* @ Uber)
[Gos] Emma Strap Pumps (*new* @ Uber)

pose: [KoKoLoReS] Sadness pose pack (*new* @ Pose Fair)
MINIMAL – Checkpoint Corridor  (*new* @ Uber)

No One

Just this….cuz…reasons.

Mothica – No One

You curl my name with your lip
I take a drink, I hate it
I tell you what you want to hear, so I
Can catch my breath and step away
Think about what to say to you
While you come unglued
I don’t know how to make it clear
I’ve tried it out all these years
But it doesn’t seem to go through
Til now

Here I go, hear what I’m saying
What I want to say, what I want to say
All this time, you thought I would be your girl
I’m sorry, I belong to no one, no one
I belong to no one, no one
I’m not known to hold on, hold on too long

There you go, take it back
You didn’t mean this and you didn’t mean that
What were you thinking when you thought you could touch me last night?
I know you don’t think it’s wrong if you don’t break the skin
But if I want to touch, I’ll ask for it, oh oh oh, until I
Can catch my breath and step away
Think about what to say to you
While you come unglued
I don’t know how to make it clear
I’ve tried it out all these years
But it doesn’t seem to go through
Til now

Here I go, hear what I’m saying
What I want to say, what I want to say
All this time, you thought I would be your girl
I’m sorry, I belong to no one, no one
I belong to no one, no one
I’m not known to hold on, hold on too long

There you go, take it back
You didn’t mean this and you didn’t mean that
What were you thinking when you thought you could touch me
I know you don’t think it’s wrong if you don’t break the skin
But if I want to touch, I’ll ask for it, oh oh oh

Here I go, hear what I’m saying
What I want to say, what I want to say
All this time, you thought I would be your girl
I’m sorry, I belong to no one, no one
I belong to no one, no one
I’m not known to hold on, hold on too long

No One

wearing:
hair:   Lamb. Halo
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
skin: [Glam Affair] Dee Applier [ Catwa ] 007 (*new* @ Au Lovely)
ELLURE – “VIIAN” Flower Earrings (*new* @ Vanity Event)
(Yummy) Dark Magic Ring Set
_CandyDoll_ Aida Top (*new* @ FaMESHed)
_CandyDoll_ Aids Shorts (*new* @ FaMESHed)
pose: FOXCITY. Selfie VOL2 Bento Pose Set
MINIMAL – Sequoia Room (*new* @ C88)

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