Almost Time

It’s almost time for us to break out the summer clothes and the swimsuits. This year, I’m planning a big spring cleaning project. I’m going through my RL inventory and decluttering my life. Clothes I haven’t worn for more than a year…GONE! Knick knacks with no sentimental attachments or things I don’t LOVE….GONE! Then I’m redecorating my bedroom. I’m going to paint it and rearrange the furniture. I might do the same with my bathroom. As for the pool? Yeah, I’ll leave that to SL, cuz my ass does not go out in public in a swimsuit….*laughs*….there are children there and they will be scarred for life.

almost time

wearing:
hair: little bones. Relay (*new* @ C88)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
skin: Glam Affair – Mindy
BUENO-Crochet Bikini (*new* @ FaMESHed)
.:KC:. DIANA Feet Jewels

pose: FOXCITY. Higher Bento Pose Set (*new* @ Pose Fair)
VOID – Surfer Girl Garden Pool

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Chickens Can’t Read, Right?

Her sister and her chickens. She couldn’t believe that her nephew couldn’t spell “chicken” or “for.” She sighed and leaned against the chicken coop. Her sister was going to owe her one helluva a favor for this. She felt like a dumb hick waiting to sell chickens or fresh eggs to people that just drive up. There wasn’t even a decent signal to amuse herself with her phone. She thought about the Angry Birds game and chuckled to herself as she wondered how far she could throw a chicken. It was just then she noticed that two of the chickens seemed to be looking at the sign as if they were reading it. She laughed to herself, “Chicken can’t read, right?”

Chickens Can't Read

wearing:
hair:  :::Phoenix::: Maya Hair (*new* @ Hairology)
head: CATWA HEAD Tala
body: Maitreya Mesh Body

ChicModa // Cyndi Top (*new* @ Cosmopolitan)
UC_Jeans_skirt (*new* @ 4Mesh)
-KC- BELIZE WEDGES (*new* @ 4Mesh)

pose by Del May

scene:
JIAN Chicken Coop (*new* @ FaMESHed)
JIAN Chicken Collection
DRD – GG – Junk Yard Signs – Chickuns (Aug Group Gift)
[we’re CLOSED] trees

Love Me

How could this be anything but a music post? The minute I saw this gorgeous Neveah jumpsuit from Cynful I knew exactly how I wanted to photograph it. It screams “love me” doesn’t it? This led me to an earworm….so here you go…link & lyrics…details below the picture. Have a good one♥

Lovepool by The Cardigans

Dear, I fear we’re facing a problem
You love me no longer, I know
And maybe there is nothing that I can do
To make you do
Mama tells me I shouldn’t bother
That I ought to stick to another man
A man that surely deserves me
But I think you do!
So I cry, I pray and I beg
Love me love me
Say that you love me
Fool me fool me
Go on and fool me
Love me love me
Pretend that you love me
Leave me leave me
Just say that you need me
So I cry, and I beg for you to
Love me love me
Say that you love me
Leave me leave me
Just say that you need me
I can’t care ’bout anything but you
Lately I have desperately pondered,
Spent my nights awake and I wonder
What I could have done in another way
To make you stay
Reason will not lead to solution
I will end up lost in confusion
I don’t care if you really care
As long as you don’t go

love me

wearing:
hair: .LeLutka.HF03 hair
head: CATWA HEAD Tala
body: Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara V4.1

Astralia – Wisdom angel bracelets Black
.:E.A.Studio:. BOX Moray Nails -Gloves-Ring Set

[Cynful] Neveah Jumpsuit
KC– IMPERO BOOTS

pose by Foxcity (edited with Anypose)
scene:
Pseudo– Movie theather Scene
Quasi – Love Me Neon Sign

Perfectly Flawed

I’ll be completely honest. I’m the kind of girl that learns most of her life lessons the hardest way possible. I don’t know how many real life musicians I had to date, before I figured out that they were not for me. I tried every drug that came my way, fortunately without the use of needles. I’ve tried a variety of clothing styles. Some of them were definitely not meant for my body type. I’ve tried an endless array of hairstyles, again not all of them fit. I’ve had all types of jobs from restaurants & hotels to medical to office administration. I’ve been friends with people from all walks of life. Thinking I was open minded enough not to judge some of their bizarre lifestyle choices. And before you get your panties twisted, I mean actual lifestyle choices like having pink hair in real life knowing it will limit your job/career options(not that bizarre) or decorating your yard with zombie gnomes (#lifegoal). Even now, I don’t want to list the choices I personally find bizarre, because to each their own. I simply cannot understand or relate to somethings and quite frankly think others are just plain fucked up and wrong (zoophilia.)
perfectly flawed
With that said, one thing I’ve never been good at is saving money. Ever. I can hold someone else’s money and never touch it, but my own? Nope. I’ll spend it everytime and most of the time it isn’t even spent very wisely. Yes, I do worry a little bit about what life will be when I’m older, but I do have some things in order. I have a home that’s paid in full. For now a working car that I love and is also paid in full. If I end up alone, I’ll have a spare bedroom I can rent out. So, I’ve thought about those things, see?
However, who promised that I’d grow old enough for that plan? Who promised me that Linden Labs would survive more than a year after I joined in 2006? Who guaranteed me a life worth living when I’m 60? NO ONE. So, yes, I’ve chosen to live life a bit on the edge. Daring myself to enjoy one moment after the next, however I see fit.
perfectly flawed 2
I do my best not to hurt people along the way, but none of us are perfect and on occasion we will all hurt someone we love. Whether its a seemingly harmless joke wrapped in barbed wire or simply a careless action or God forbid desires that overrule all common sense. What matters is that we learn to forgive, so that we don’t carry those resentments around weighing down our souls. What matters is recognizing what we’ve done and not simply apologizing, but amending our behaviors. What matters is letting go of those that consistently harm us, even if they seem beneficial in other areas of our lives. What matters is genuinely learning to love ourselves, flaws and all.

perfectly flawed 3

What matters is being true to ourselves, because if we can’t be loving, true, and kind to ourselves? We’ll never be able to genuinely offer those attributes to another individual.

Until you can live your life and love it, you have nothing but lies to offer the rest of us.

My life sure isn’t perfect, nor am I, but I know one thing for sure:
I AM PERFECTLY FLAWED!

CREDITS:
hair: Jenna by Analog Dog
CATWA HEAD Dyana
Glamistry – Sunglasses [PU2004]
:Diamante: Disengaged Plugs Piercing (*new* @ Fetish Fair)
**RE**  Simone Heart Collar
Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara
.:::G.ID:::. Muse Tattoo
Vinyl – London Crop Top Group Gift Pak
Bauhaus Movement – Bass Alert Bracelets
[MANDALA]Sinra Rings Season2
.08 [ kunst ] – Slim Cigarette #2 (*new* @ Kustom9)
LRD Ripped Jeans Robin
-KC- IMPERO BOOTS

poses by Del May some edited using AnyPose
photos taken at Carnival of Chaos

The Storm

The fishermen know that the sea is dangerous and the storm terrible, but they have never found these dangers sufficient reason for remaining ashore. Vincent Van Gogh
The Storm
Oh where to start? Do I make the analogy about not being afraid to love again? Or talk about the actual weather? Decisions…ugh…someone decide for me!
Alright, alright, the truth is, I wanted to make the analogy about love, because a dear friend of mine is going through a hard time recovering from the bitter taste of betrayal  from a previous relationship. We’ve all been there, but a hardened heart is not the answer. We can’t punish ourselves by leaving in fear.
Love hurts…a lot…a lot of the time, but when its good….is there any better feeling? I’m no expert. God knows, I screw up all the time. I’m personally doing pretty well at the moment and I’m counting my blessings, but it wasn’t too long ago that my friends had to keep the light of hope open for me. I was done. I was ready to give up forever. Seriously, it was dark and I will be forever grateful to the stength loaned to me by my dearest friends.
Its ok to wallow for a while. Sometimes we need that. Its okay to cry and kick and scream at the sky. Those tantrums can be quite therapeutic. So can shopping! So, before I go all Deepak Chopra on you…lets talk about how we can battle the storms or better yet, CREATE some storms in Second Life. Ok, I think we all know how to create a storm in SL, lets not go stirring up drama, I meant a literal storm…full of bright colors and glitter, yessss, THAT kind of storm. See all the glorious details below!

wearing:
Exile:: You Send Me
CATWA HEAD Dyana
Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara
LRD dress Tess Rare 2 (*new* @ Lost & Found)
=Zenith=Spring Picnic Rattan Basket B (Milk)
.:KC:. CATY Wedges

uK– Little Bird Chandelier Dark (*new* @ Whimsical)
uK – Twisted Oak Bird Bath Ancient (*new* @ Whimsical)
{anc} NO LIMITS // flock of flying doves. [ham-pink]
E.V.E {M/C}Tornado (*new* @ Enchantment)
All of the trees and grass are from Studio Skye.

Freedom

Freedom is something that dies unless it’s used. Hunter S. Thompson

As a U.S. citizen, I think freedom is something I and many of my fellow Americans have taken for granted. I am not going to get all political. I think there’s far too much of that going on across the internet as it stands, or maybe not enough. I am not very politically driven, I’ll admit. However, I’ve been thinking about my freedom a lot lately. Okay, maybe watching Orange is the New Black and Wentworth Prison on Netflix had a little bit to do with that. Plus, the 4th of July aka Independence Day is approaching…so yeah…let freedom ring right though my head for a week or two until I go back to taking it for granted again.

My point is that I have this incredible freedom to leash up my dog, toss in some earbuds, and go for long walks outside whenever I choose. In fact, I’d say my neighborhood is relatively safe enough that I could even do that at 2am if I wanted. I can scream to the top of my lungs that I hate (insert any political figure) and not worry about being arrested. I can dress pretty much however I want when I leave my house (albeit, that’s how we end up on sites like People of Walmart). I am pretty damn free, but I spend most of my free time, sitting on my ass in a dark room (avoiding screen glare), staring at a computer screen.

I am not complaining about the time I spend online communicating with people or any of my time online, to be honest. I’m simply saying that its time for me to appreciate my two half assed working legs (two knee replacements) and the beauty of not only mother nature, but my own real neighborhood. I encourage you all to do the same. Next time, you find yourself in SL and feeling “bored?” Log out, go outside, even if its the middle of the night and you can only go as far as right outside your door. Take a long deep breath of fresh air and embrace whatever freedoms are allotted to you.

summer

Lamb. Sometimes – Light Brown Pack
CATWA HEAD Dyana
Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara
=Zenith=Summer belted shirt dress
.:KC:. CATY Wedges

Drive Away

I watch a lot of my friend struggling with letting go and walking away. I know people have often thought of me as cold and callous, because I possess this almost innate ability to walk away and let go. However, this was not a skill I developed over time. This was something that was thrust upon me repeatedly throughout my life. Being a military brat, I moved and changed schools regularly. We were never in one place for more than a few years. My family didn’t consult me or warn me that we were moving. So, throughout my childhood, I was ripped away from people and places that I loved with no say in my fate.

For many of my adult years, I did try to hold onto people, places, and things that really weren’t good for me. I wanted to establish some sense of permanence. Sadly, more often than not, I was holding on for the wrong reasons. The older I got the less I embraced change. Until one day my entire world changed overnight. I won’t go into the details, as that’s a novella at best, but that day…I made a decision that would forever alter the course of my life and thankfully so.

From that day forward, I was able to embrace what my childhood had taught me to do so many times. Move on. Move forward. Let go. Walk away. And now? When I realize that someone, some place, something is not right for my life in whatever capacity, I think it over and sometimes I fight to stay longer than I should, but once I know its time to go? I don’t walk away. I hop in the car and I DRIVE and I’m not looking back.

driving away.jpg

hair: *ARGRACE* MISAO (*new* in store)
CATWA HEAD Dyana with Glam Affair – Catwa Applier – Aurore – Artic 01 (*new* @Kustom9)  combined w/eyeliner, lipstick, and beauty mark from Lara Hurley-Christy Pale *Catwa Appliers*
Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara
^^Swallow^^ Ears Pax BLACK (*new* at The Arcade)
.4 [ kunst ] – Septum Keeper
.5 [ kunst ] – Spike Labret
.::Dead Dollz::. Echo Dress
.:Avanti:. Zeta Bracelets – Platinum
Izzie’s – Spring Midi Rings (silver)
.:KC:. CATY Wedges

pose: oOo boo!ty_four
picture taken @ Elysion

Blue Skies

Blue days, all of them gone
Nothin’ but blue skies from now on
Blue skies smilin’ at me
Nothin’ but blue skies do I see ~Ella Fitgerald’s “Blue Skies”

Although Summer has not officially started, the weather where I live is nice and the pool is open. The beaches are filling up. Its beautiful outside almost every single day. I personally have been dealt with more than my fair share of metaphorically dark clouds and I’ve made the decision to embrace those blue skies and focus on my blessings rather that all the things I could easily consider curses.

For example, I recently found out that someone very close to me fed me a ton of lies, but upon revealing the truths I was reunited with some very dear and wonderful friends from my past. So, I might have lost one friend, but I gained three in return. If that’s not a blessing, I don’t know what is….so bring on the blue skies, cuz that’s all I want to see! *lifts a margarita* Here’s to blue skies for us all! ❤

blue skies

hair:TRUTH HAIR Arwen (*new* @ The Secret Affair)
ears: UNISEX[MANDALA]Steking EARS
glasses: [Z O O M] Scar Glasses
rings: Kibitz – Olzen ring set silver
nail polish-{ZOZ}– Summer 2015 Glitter Tips (Maitreya)
cover up: .::Dead Dollz::. Dune Beach Robe – Cyan (*new* @ Uber)
bikini: .::Dead Dollz::. Dune Bikini – Cyan (*new* @ Uber)
shoes: .:KC:. CATY Wedges

pose: GingerFish Poses – Euphoria #3

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