Get on with my day

So much has happened this year, that I completely forgot that my blog turned four years old last month. I was hoping to do something special, but with the world the way it is right now…is it any wonder that I forgot? I didn’t even do my April Fool’s jokes this year. I just couldn’t bring myself to trick anyone the way I like to. Instead of saying, “Have a good day” we’re saying, “stay safe.” More and more of us grow infuriated by those that don’t take this seriously and stay home. Especially in the U.S., where we have so many government officials trying to minimize and politicize this pandemic. There’s so much confusion and misinformation going around out there. I’m just doing my best to not completely freak out. So, that’s just a peek into my scrambled little brain this morning. I guess I need to get on with my day and try not to think too much on the virus, as I am staying home and doing my best to stay safe.

Sady is wearing:
hair:  DOUX – Sins hairstyle
head: LeLUTKA Lake Head 1.1
body:  [LEGACY] Meshbody (f) (1.2)
skin: [theSkinnery] Signe @ Uber

Ascendant – Temptress Nails
Little Fox – Debbie crop top @ Belle
Kaithleen’s Falling Panties

Lyrium. Comfort Zone Backdrop
**poses built in**

Do they know?

Do creepy people know they are creepy? So, I have a fictional character page where I post my blog links. I started it when my regular Facebook page kept being reported by an ex or one of her psycho friends. Every once in a while, I’ll get a comment from someone that has an real life looking page with a picture of some creepy looking dude. Usually the messages are just “hello” or some form of generic greeting. I always ignore them. I have to assume they are either trolls or genuine creeps. It just makes me wonder.
I know that I’m a dork. I also know that I have a great deal of self awareness, but am I delusional to think that creeps are completely unaware of their creepiness? Or do they get off on making people uncomfortable? Perhaps they are just pervy trolls. Yeah, probably. I mean, why else would they be soooo creepy, right?

gotta light?

wearing:
hair: DOUX – Kathleen hairstyle @ equal10
head: GENUS Project – Genus Head – Classic Face
LOTUS. Passion Eyes 05 (Genus) @ equal10
skin: DeeTaleZ Skin *Kacee* for GENUS HEADS
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
Tattoo “Rise of Quetzalcoatl”_by GoK
Kaithleen’s Robin Bodyfur @ equal10

Diversion – Main Girl Poses @ La Vie en Pose

Loose my self – Proximity – The Bearded Guy @ Access

Bloggies!

So, this is just super exciting news that I’m dying to share. I really try not to boast or brag ever, because I just think its tacky. However, I just won an award for Best Narrative Blogger by BVN!! This was such a huge deal to me, especially considering who the runners up were. I mean, Strawberry Singh and Skippy Beresford? Seriously? I don’t know how I won over either of them, because they are two of the most talented photographers and bloggers I’ve ever seen. All I can say is that I have some seriously good friends and readers. Upon receiving my award, I knew that I owe it to my readers to be better than song lyrics and quick quotes. So, I’m going to do my absolute best to actually write more. I’m not saying I won’t still use song lyrics here and there, but I’m going to try not to rely so heavily on them going forward. You are the ones that voted for me and I appreciate it soooooo much. The best way I can show you how grateful I am

wearing:
hair:  Lamb. Garden (*new* @ FaMESHed)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara
skin: [theSkinnery] Amber (*new* @ C88)

: CULT : Dark Side Rings
[ kunst ] – Lucy choker
(Yummy) Cleopatra Nose Ring – Silver
Schadenfreude Tear Dermal Piercing
-SU!- Medusa Piercing Silver

*T.Whore* – Sexy Fur Stole White MESH
Kaithleen’s Kala Set

pose: FOXCITY. Rain Bento Pose Set (*new* @ C88)
location: BVN Bloggie Awards

Remembering Him

Have you ever met someone that altered your life completely? Someone that was only there for just a little while, but forever altered the course of your life? I did…almost married him, in fact. Fortunately, I didn’t, because looking back, I’m quite sure that wasn’t his purpose in my life, but changes were made that forced me to look at myself far deeper than I ever imagined I would. He still crosses my mind and I have no way of knowing if he’s dead or alive. I wouldn’t dare to look him up, for fear of what I might find. Somethings are just better left in the past.

wearing:
hair: TRUTH / Bewkie
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body – Lara
skin: [Glam Affair] Austine Applier [ Catwa ] Basic Line FLF

.::Supernatural::. Sora choker White/White Pearl Silver
[Avenge] Pearls earrings
: CULT : His Princess Rings/Silver
LYBRA . XL STILETTO NAILS

Kaithleen’s Pearl Corset (*new* @ Kinky)
Eudora3D Arianne Pumps&Socks (*new* @ Enchantment)

pose by Bauhaus Movement
tarte. old window bed (striped)

See the Reason

“See the mirror in your eyes
See the truth behind the lies
Your lies are haunting me
See the reason in your eyes
Giving answer to the why
Your eyes are haunting me”
~Armin van Buuren feat. Sharon den Adel – In and Out of Love

wearing:
hair: DOUX – Mya hairstyle
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
–SU!– Xanthe Lip Gloss
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
skin: DeeTaleZ *Appliers* CATWA Head “Myra”

[Avenge] Floreal sunglasses (*new* @ Dubai Event)
[Avenge] Sweet Flowers earrings (*new* @ Dubai Event)
[Avenge] Sweet Flowers necklace (*new* @ Dubai Event)
DRD – Gypsy Bangles
: CULT : His Princess Rings/Gold (*new* @ Kinky)
Ascendant – Wish Coffin Bento Nails 05 (*new* @ MBA)
Kaithleen’s Olga Lace Top (*new* for Go by FaMESHed)

pose: [La Baguette] Fiona poses (*new* @ Blush)

Dark Desire

As he passed her in the club, her gripped her wrist, pulling her in for a quick whisper, “Wait for me in the restroom.”
His voice was so deep and he smelled amazing. There was a fierceness in his eyes that was intimidating, but something about him drove her to follow his instructions. She did as she was told and waited, craving the mystery man and the darkness he would bring.

wearing:

hair:  Tableau Vivant \\ Elly hair
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
skin: DeeTaleZ *Appliers* CATWA Head “Myra”

AsteroidBox. Tiresias Wraps – Black

Moon Elixir – Coven – 6 – Maitreya – Arm Wraps – Charcoal

: CULT : Dark Side Rings (F) Silver (*new* for Go by FaMESHed)

#4~Nerido~ Margarita String (Maitreya)-Black (*new* @ Epiphany)

29 Kaithleen’s Beach Gacha Dress – Maitreya Black Fishnet RARE (*new* @ Epiphany)

pose: an lar [poses] The Altered Series

KraftWork Wick’s Bathroom (*new* @ Vanity Event)

Only Human

The song says it all.

Rag’n’Bone Man ~ Human

I’m only human
I’m only, I’m only
I’m only human, human

Maybe I’m foolish
Maybe I’m blind
Thinking I can see through this
And see what’s behind
Got no way to prove it
So maybe I’m blind
But I’m only human after all
I’m only human after all
Don’t put your blame on me
Don’t put your blame on me

Take a look in the mirror
And what do you see
Do you see it clearer
Or are you deceived
In what you believe
‘Cause I’m only human after all
You’re only human after all
Don’t put the blame on me
Don’t put your blame on me

Some people got the real problems
Some people out of luck
Some people think I can solve them
Lord heavens above
I’m only human after all
I’m only human after all
Don’t put the blame on me
Don’t put the blame on me

Don’t ask my opinion
Don’t ask me to lie
Then beg for forgiveness
For making you cry
Making you cry
‘Cause I’m only human after all
I’m only human after all
Don’t put your blame on me
Don’t put the blame on me

Oh, some people got the real problems
Some people out of luck
Some people think I can solve them
Lord heavens above
I’m only human after all
I’m only human after all
Don’t put the blame on me
Don’t put the blame on me

I’m only human
I make mistakes
I’m only human
That’s all it takes
To put the blame on me
Don’t put the blame on me

I’m no prophet or Messiah
Should go looking somewhere higher
I’m only human after all
I’m only human after all
Don’t put the blame on me
Don’t put the blame on me

I’m only human
I do what I can
I’m just a man
I do what I can
Don’t put the blame on me
Don’t put your blame on me

wearing:
hair:   Lamb. Dream (*new* @ Uber)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
skin: Glam Affair – Willow – Jamaica (*new* @ Uber)
Kaithleen’s Summer Breeze Dress (*new* @ Shiny Shabby)

pose by Del May
SEUL – Elevator Highrise

Walk on Water

If I’m not allowed to give up on my life, because of how bad things are, then I cannot give up on my country either. Many times over the years, I’ve thought to myself that I no longer love America, because there is so much hate. However, the song/video I’m sharing with this post really made me think. I can’t speak for other countries, but just maybe you can find some pride for your own within this song/video. I don’t think most of us are all that different. So, with Independence Day just around the corner, I’ve decided to stand by the U.S.A. and never give up the hope that we will overcome these adverse times. We are not a perfect country, we never will be, and while I don’t think its all that great right now…it has been and will be again someday. It’s up to us whether we allow adversity and diversity to make us come together or stand apart. I choose to stand proudly amidst all the diversity and proudly claim myself an American.

Thirty Seconds to Mars-Walk on Water

Oh oh, oh oh
Oh oh, oh oh
Oh oh, oh oh (do you believe?) walk on water
Oh oh, oh oh

Can you even see what you’re fighting for?
Bloodlust and a holy war
Listen up, hear the patriots shout
“Times are changing”
In the end, the choice was clear
Take a shot in the face of fear
Fist up in the fiery light
Times are changing

Oh oh, oh oh
Do you believe that you can walk on water?
Oh oh, oh oh
Do you believe that you can win this fight tonight?
(Do you believe?)

Look at the sky, see a dying star
White lies, it’s a man on fire
Making love with the devil hurts
Times are changing

A thin line, the whole truth
The far right, the left view
Breaking all those promises made
Times are changing

Oh oh, oh oh
Do you believe that you can walk on water?
Oh oh, oh oh
Do you believe that you can win this fight tonight?
Oh oh, oh oh
Do you believe that you can walk on water?
Oh oh, oh oh
Do you believe that you can win this fight tonight?

Do you believe? Walk on water
Do you believe? Walk on water
Do you believe? Walk on water
Do you believe? Walk on water

Do you believe? Walk on water
Do you believe? Walk on water
Do you believe? Walk on water
Do you believe? Walk on water

Oh oh, oh oh
Do you believe that you can walk on water?
Oh oh, oh oh
Do you believe that you can win this fight tonight?
Oh oh, oh oh (do you believe? Walk on water)
Do you believe that you can walk on water?
Oh oh, oh oh (do you believe? Walk on water)
Do you believe that you can win this fight tonight?

Oh oh, oh oh (do you believe?)
Oh oh, oh oh (walk on water)
Oh oh, oh oh (do you believe?)
Oh oh, oh oh (walk on water)

wearing:
hair: DOUX – Gabryela hairstyle (*new* @ Access)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
skin: [theSkinnery] Kailee (*new* @ C88)
*LODE* Head Accessory – Stone Flower [grey]
Kaithleen’s Kala Set (*new* @ We <3RP)
Essenz – Kingston (*new* @ Good Vibes Fair)

pose by Di’s Opera

Yes to Heaven

I don’t have the words, but Lana Del Rey does, so here you go….

Lana Del Rey ~ Yes to Heaven

If you dance I’ll dance
And if you don’t I’ll dance anyway
Give peace a chance
Let the fear you have fall away
I’ve got my eye on you
I’ve got my eye on you
Say yes to heaven
Say yes to me
Say yes to heaven
Say yes to me
If you go I’ll stay
You come back I’ll be right here
Like a barge at sea
In the storm I stay clear
‘Cause I’ve got my mind on you
I’ve got my mind on you
Say yes to heaven
Say yes to me
Say yes to heaven
Say yes to me
If you dance I’ll dance
I’ll put my red dress on again
And if you fight I’ll fight
It doesn’t matter, now it’s all gone
I’ve got my mind on you
I’ve got my mind on you
Say yes to heaven
Say yes to me
Say yes to heaven
Say yes to me
I’ve got my eye on you
I’ve got my eye on you
I’ve got my eye on you
I’ve got my eye on you

wearing:
hair: RAMA.SALON  – Caroline (*new* @ equal10)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
skin: Glam Affair –  Rayna (*new* @ C88)
*AvaWay* CARRIE Necklaces
(Yummy) Sea Treasures Ring Set (*new* @ C88)
Kaithleen’s Ellie Boho Maxi Skirt (*new* @ FaMESHed)

pose: GingerFish Poses – Moonlight and Martinis set (*new* @ Vintage Fair)

location: {mystical fae}

Not This Time

Each time  some one hurts me, each time my heart is broken, and left scarred…it gets harder and harder to even believe in true love, at least not for me. My close friends know what a hard time I’m having in the real these days. Yes, SL is my escape. Yes, my real life is pretty sad and a whole lot of scary right now. My husband and I have been separated but sharing a home for over two years. He had his room, I had mine. There were times that I was hopeful that we might could work it out. He has recently moved out and moved in with the woman with whom his affair was the end of our marriage.
There are times when I am grateful for what I have and do my best to stay positive. There are times that I take great comfort in violent fantasies. Most of all I wake up each day disappointed that it not just a bad dream. This nightmare is my reality.
I’m dealing with a grocery list of health issues that will never get better. I live in constant physical pain. I’m not writing this to complain or whine. I’m writing this to explain why I’ve decided to live the remainder of my days as a free spirit. I refuse to be tied down to things I no longer believe in.
I never wanted to get married, because I’ve never seen a successful marriage. I suck at relationships, ask any of my exes, they’ll agree. I can and do love, very deeply. Its being loved that I struggle with and it never fails that the minute I start to believe that I might just be worthy of that same love in return that I am proven wrong, each and every time. I’ve been drawn to relationships all my life. I hate feeling lonely, but the truth is…I’m not alone. I have some wonderful friends. That’s all I need. I will not seek out another romantic relationship, not this time.
Yes, I am broken, but I am broken beyond mending. I’ve accepted that and the people that I’m closest to are aware of it, too. I’ve accepted my plight and learning to let go of a dream is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, but I’m awake now. I won’t repeat my mistakes again and again…not this time…well, not for a very long time, at least. *sighs* I really mean this stuff when I say it, you know?
Deva, stop laughing. Dusty, stop rolling your eyes…I swear they’re going to roll right out of your head one day. Sora, distract him, will ya? Tracy, Grace, Kess….you cunts, just shut the hell up. *sighs* I hear you giggling, Luca. Ame, whoop her, will ya? Nikole, get the duct tape, you get it, right?

We started out as lonely hearts
We started with a promise built on highs
You said I was the missing part
Looked into my eyes said
“You’re my fix for life”

wearing:
hair: MINA – Noah  (*new* @ Uber)
head: CATWA HEAD Lona
body: Maitreya Mesh Body
skin: Glam Affair – Viktoria Applier
[Avenge] Rosary necklace double (F) – pearls (*new* @ MOM)
JIAN Chinchilla :: Hand Held
Kaithleen’s Irina Top (*new* @ ShinyShabby)

pose: an lar [poses] The Cordelia Series
taikou / summer night backdrop (*new* @ Uber)